Are you managing finances as a couple? When dealing with your finances are you asking should I buy this or should we buy this? Remember everything you do and say is either bringing you closer together or farther apart as a couple.
Therefore to keep your finances completely separated as a solution to your finances in your relationship can bring serious problems.
It is common for two individuals to keep their finances (money issues) individual in the beginning of the relationship, but as the relationship grows deeper or more serious, it is VERY important include both partner in the finances issue, or at least to talk about it regularly so both can be a part of it.
You have to change the conversation of managing finances as a couple from I, to WE. Why? Or else it will bring problems. Let me give you some examples.
- Jonathan is always arguing with his wife because every month she is sending lots of money to her cousin and is always saying that they do not have enough money to go out.
- Jennifer is always in a bad mood because she does not have enough money. Her partner, Joseph wastes some serious money buying expensive clothes and going out drinking with his friends from work. Jennifer does not like the fact that Joseph does not offer to pay for more than half the rent when he makes 3 times more money than her.
- Jill is very angry because she always buy groceries and her partner Jeffrey does no even buy a pack of gum.
There are always things more serious in a relationship than managing finances as a couple, but talking about it and making a plan is definitely a priority if you want your relationship to last
Here are questions you should change to – When Managing Finances As a Couple
- Is this something I can pay for? Instead ask this – Is this something we can pay for?
- Is this something I need? Instead ask this – Is this something we need?
- Is this a priority for me? Instead ask this – Is this something that is a priority for us?
I know there are times you have to buy things for yourself individually because you are an individual. But when it comes to things that is going to affect both partners, you need to substitute those questions from I to WE!
Managing Finances as a couple always speaks the WE language
Remember that not talking about managing your finances as a couple is not a solution. The silence treatment in regards to money in a relationship always brings distance from each other.
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Managing Finances together is very important for couples that want to build a long lasting relationship.